I learned about this trip a few days before I was leaving for Maui for a month. It seemed crazy to make plans for another adventure, but the dates were perfect during Spring break, a lot of my bike friends from Morris Area Freewheelers would be going, and you couldn’t beat the very inexpensive price, so I put down a deposit. Emily would be accompanying Michael and the PU Orchestra on tour to Sofia, Belgrade and Budapest, and the pet sitter we had for Maui was available again to stay with Louie. After three years of not traveling at all, I guess it was time to start making up for it.
I am writing this a number of months later, so the experiences have settled and softened. I have practiced with meditation teachers Steve Armstrong and Kamala Masters for almost 20 years and have always wanted to visit their retreat center on Maui. With all of Michael’s health issues, it has been challenging to find a time when I could be away for a month, but December/January looked like it would work so I made the reservation last June and hoped for the best. As the holidays approached, everyone was healthy, including Steve, who was doing miraculously well five years after a glioblastoma diagnosis. Michael, Emily and I planned a family vacation for 4 days before my retreat. We arrived on Maui in a terrible rain-storm that diverted planes and cancelled flights. Luckily, we landed safely and stayed in a beautiful condo near the beach in Kihei. We only had one good swimming day after the storm, but we did a lot of driving around the Island and visited our old Princeton friend Maida Pollock. She had retired to her son’s farm in Kula, which was, amazingly, right down the dirt road from the retreat center! Michael and Emily went on to spend Christmas on the Big Island at Volcano National Park, and I started a monthlong retreat in Paradise.
I rented a cool and funky house in Berlin MD for a family beach get-a-way this summer. I was very happy to avoid a complicated trip to Europe, or anywhere that involved flying, especially after the travel hassles of Utah. I was even happier that Emily could join us. The house was attractive and comfortable with a fenced in area for Louie, AC, WiFi, and beautiful outside garden areas to cook, eat and even watch TV. The host lived in a trailer at the back of the property, with “Boyfriend” and three dogs. Louie made friends with Laurie’s dogs through the fence, and “Boyfriend,” a chef at a local restaurant, even shared some fresh off the boat tuna with us one night. Laurie was a warm and generous character with unending helpful advice about everything.
Bryce Canyon and Zion National Parks have been on my bucket list for a while, and I finally got to see them on a wonderful Backroads bike trip. I still had a deposit with them from the Greece trip that I had to cancel the first summer of COVID. I have been hesitant about traveling in general, but I made the reservation back in January when I was safely nestled at home. Cases were down in NJ in the early spring, but started to pick up again as the warmer weather approached. I did the best I could to stay healthy before the trip, and would hope for the best while traveling with 16 new friends on the trip itself.
I just got home from 12 glorious days at Forest Refuge and feel much revived and restored. It was the first time back in almost exactly two years when I was one of the last yogis there before the beginning of the pandemic shut the world down. Rebecca Bradshaw was teaching again, and it was also her first time back since March of 2020. At my interview with her the day after I arrived, she said “so, we return to the scene of the crime!” Yikes. The preparation for being away on retreat is always quite involved, but this time was especially stressful due to the strict testing protocols necessary to even enter the IMS buildings let along stay for 12 days.
I have been remiss in adding blog posts for the second half of 2021. Maybe it is because the pandemic seemed to be ending, which was scary and stressful as we went back to more normal activities, but then it came roaring back and kept on going. Life continued with both a sameness that was discouraging as we just made the best of it all, and a new anxiety as we tried to integrate a return to regular life in the midst of an ongoing pandemic and a changed world. Maybe what I thought was equanimity was actually a dullness masking anxiety. Even so, Michael and I have a lot to be thankful for: we remained healthy and safe and I enjoyed a lot of lovely bike rides on my new bike. Here are some highlights:
I have to say it: I hated teaching in person this semester – mostly. Private voice lessons with me wearing a mask and the student wearing a mask were frustrating and almost completely useless. The students were thrilled to be back in person, and OK, it was nice to be able to accompany in real time. But the technical instruction that the students needed was impossible to convey. I took them through their exercises and guessed at what they were doing with their mouths and tongues. I did try to do some hands on physical adjustments in posture and movement but I also wanted to keep my distance. In general, I was not comfortable being in a small room for an hour with someone deliberately exhaling at me. And the students were all incredibly sick with everything else but COVID: strep throat, bronchitis, laryngitis, colds, mono, stuffed noses, coughing, you name it. They called it the Princeton Plague and it got most of the students at one point or another. OK, I didn’t have to sing at all, but my historic trauma with worrying about getting sick, combined with the past 18 months of being conditioned to be afraid of getting sick had me extremely triggered.
At the other extreme, I was teaching Singing American Musical Theatre as a performance class again and it was wonderful.
Last year was a major birthday for me. We had planned a fabulous trip to Greece, and I thought I would buy myself a new road bike as well to celebrate. Alas, all of that got postponed because of the pandemic. Now a year later I am very hesitant to plan any major traveling, but just for fun I did stop by my local bike shops to see what kinds of bikes might be available. COVID restrictions had made cycling a hugely popular activity and there was a world-wide bike shortage to go with the world-wide virus. At the Trek shop in Princeton the very nice lady gave me a sad smile and shook her head, “all the bikes are spoken for until January of 2023.” At Halter’s in Montgomery Shopping Center, the owner rolled out a beautiful lilac Cannondale supersix – evo in my size, “this is the perfect bike for you, but you have to buy it today or someone else will.” That was way too much pressure after the simple, slow life of lockdown. At Sourland Cycles in Hopewell, they had a floor model of a road bike that I could take for a test ride. It wasn’t my size, it wasn’t really an upgrade from my beloved Bianchi, but they did have a bike on a truck coming in about a week that wasn’t reserved and might be of interest to me. Ok, I took the Giant brand women’s model out for a spin and liked the disc brakes and wider tires. Sure, I’ll put a refundable deposit on the bike that’s coming and take it for a test ride before anyone else nabs it.
Coming home from Cape May, we settled back into our sheltering at home routine. Emily and the kitties were still with us, I was still doing a lot of online teaching, Michael was deeply into a writing project, and we had figured out the cooking and cleaning routines. In February it snowed, a lot. I took out my cross country skiis for the first time in several years, and used them every day, on many open space trails near home, and in the back yard as Louie bounded joyously through the deepening snow drifts. Skiing was wonderful, but I didn’t ride my bike, or see any of my few friends for socially distant rides or walks all month. The cold and gray and isolation started to take its toll and we all got a bit more edgy and short with each other. The vaccination was becoming available to more and more people, but appointments were hard to come by and some folks spent all hours of the day and night searching for spots.
Michael finally got an appointment for the end of February. We had to drive an hour to Holmdel. He waited in line for several hours while I stayed in the car and peed in the woods, as I had been doing all year on my bike rides. He felt weak and crummy for the first 24 hours but then bounced back and was so relieved and hopeful to be on his way to some protection from this crazy virus. His second Moderna shot was scheduled for the end of March. Meanwhile, I wasn’t even eligible yet, too young and healthy.
I took the plunge and reserved 9 days at a cottage I found on AirBnB a few blocks from the Delaware Bay beach in North Cape May. I wanted to go there alone and do a self-meditation retreat for a week. Michael would come down for a few days at the end. It sounded like it would work, but I spent most of December planning what food and cleaning supplies I would bring with me to make it feel safe in the midst of COVID. Finally, the day of departure arrived and I went to the market first thing and grabbed a weeks-worth of simple meals, loaded up the car, and drove the easy two and a quarter hour trip to Cape May. The host had told me that the house would be cleaned on Monday and then sit empty for three days before I arrived on Friday. That seemed pretty safe. Even so, I wiped down all door handles and light switches with Lysol and washed my hands before I unpacked and settled in. The cottage was adorable, with surf and sand decorations including crabs and octopi. The kitchen was perfectly functional and the sun coming in the windows filled my heart with warmth and joy. The neighborhood was very quiet and peaceful and the beach, really only two blocks away, was magnificent.
